The Wheel Turns

Social Networking

2012-01-28T12:53:00.000-07:00

Hello Bloggers!

I've been busy keeping up with my website, Facebook and Twitter pages, which has left my blog high and dry for a while.

I'm finding it easier to post daily to my Priestess Najah Facebook page. So if you'd like to keep up with my magickal comings and goings, please be sure to check out my Facebook page at www.facebook.com/PriestessNajah

Thanks so much and Bright Blessings to YOU!

Chinese New Year!

2012-01-18T11:29:00.000-07:00

Five days until Chinese New Year! Its the year of the Dragon! If you've not made your Gregorian New Year's Resolutions, now you get another chance! Here's a link to great site, telling what rites take place during the 15 days of the Chinese New Year Celebration. Isn't it great that it runs from New Moon to Full Moon!http://chinesenewyear2012.net/chinese-new-year-celebration

Bright Blessings!

No More Tebow

2012-01-15T01:42:00.001-07:00

I live in Denver. I bit my tongue as much I could about the whole Tim Tebow and prayer and winning the football game until I couldn't stand it anymore. Then finally last week on my facebook page, I posted:

I live in Denver, about a mile from Sports Authority Stadium. I don't give a rat's a$$ about football and this Tim Tebow stuff is really starting to get on my nerves. What if I just wanted to party and have a good time at the game? Are folks going to start sitting in sections according to their religions? Are you gonna have to pass through the Tebow Evangelical Tent before you enter the game? I'm just sayin - enough already.

Today the whole world knows the Broncos lost the football game. I learned that Focus on the Family posted a new commercial during the game, which is exactly why I was ecstatic about the outcome of the football game - http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/30215694/detail.html?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

Next, I decided to click on my Tarot card on the day, from Tarot.com. Boy did my mouth fall open, when the High Priestess turned up:

NAJAH's Personal Tarot Card:

The High Priestess

This Tarot Deck: Cosmic

General Meaning: Traditionally called the High Priestess, this major arcana, or trump, card represents human wisdom. She can be viewed as a kind of female Pope, the ancient Egyptian Priestess of Isis, the even older snake and bird Goddesses, the Greek Goddess Persephone, or the Eve of Genesis before the Fall.

For the accused heretics who were burnt at the stake for revering her in the 14th and 15th century, she symbolized the prophecy of the return of the Holy Spirit, which was perceived as the female aspect of the Holy Trinity.

In the sequence of cards in the major arcana, the High Priestess appears as soon as the Fool decides he wants to develop his innate powers, making a move toward becoming a Magus. The High Priestess is his first teacher, representing the Inner Life and the method for contacting it, as well as the contemplative study of Nature and the Holy Mysteries

Can't explain it, its a mystery, one that makes me go "Hmmmm".

Bright Blessings.

Winter Storm

2012-01-11T17:14:00.000-07:00

We got a lot of snow in Denver today! Driving was treacherous, lot of accidents. But thankfully it looks like we all got where we needed to go.

After getting home and settling down, took a long deep breath and look around our backyard. Lots of snow and our cute little snow mascot!:

Bright Blessings!

Bright Moon and Stars

2012-01-10T10:30:00.000-07:00

I drive West in the morning to my day job. I am always greeted by the Colorado Mountains in their splendour, grandeur and awesome-ness. Today I almost drove off the road because the Moon was so big, beautiful and bright in the morning sky. It was almost as if I could touch it.

I stared at the Moon, looking hard to see the craters and see if I could see anything different. I've been staring at the Sky since I was a little kid, waiting for something spectacular to happen, and yet I'm never disappointed with what I see when I tilt my head upwards.

This morning as I exited my home to do my morning ritual, I was greeted by the huge, white Moon, staring at me in the western sky and then a shooting star! Oh Blessed Be! I just love it when the Universe sends me signals and I see them!

What an auspicious way to begin the day. Who knows where my dreams will take me. Where will your dreams take you?

Bright Blessings,
Priestess Najah

I'm Excited!

2012-01-09T10:34:00.000-07:00

I'm excited! My website has been re-vamped and we are open for business! Be sure to check out my new pages "Oracle", "Blessed Marie LaVeau" and "Conjure Services"! http://www.craftandconjure.com/

Christmas Magic!

2011-12-25T00:50:00.001-07:00

Christmas Magic! Bright Blessings to All! Happy Holidays!

Winter Solstice Storm

2011-12-22T08:05:00.000-07:00

I was really bummed we couldn't make it up to Red Rocks. Disappointed like a child with a popped balloon. And then Scott Cunningham's words came to me:
"I sorrow not, though the world is wrapped in sleep. I sorrow not, though the icy winds blast. I sorrow not, though the snow falls hard and deep. I sorrow not, this too shall soon be past".
And then my family and I gathered in the living room and welcomed Yule and Winter. Blessed Be and Bright Blessings to us All.

Solstice Eve Day!

2011-12-21T08:41:00.000-07:00

It's Solstice Eve Day! I got up early today, even though I had the day off. I've become accustomed to viewing the Moon and the Stars in the early morning hours. I was greeted by the dark morning sky, the Moon in her final Crescent surrounded by brightly lit stars. The Sun was turning the eastern sky light blue. This is the final day of Fall, although here in Colorado, we've been in Winter for awhile.

Today I'll finish getting presents together, to be given as Christmas presents. Yes, I still love Christmas and Christmas day. Its the Spirit of the season that fills me, not the religion and I love spending the Holiday with my family and friends.

Tomorrow I'll be with my family and community, drumming up the Sun. I believe we Pagans start it off, ecstatically celebrating in the cold clear morning of the Winter Solstice. It may even snow!

Tonight I will burn an authentic Yule log in my fire pit. Two seasons have passed since our neighbor's Grand Oak Tree gifted us with oak logs. They are dry and ready to burn! I've got some lovely Yule incense to throw in the fire as well. Its a special night and I'm happy to be in tune with it, Nature, the Goddess and the glory of the seasons.

May the Solstice and this season bring us all Bright Blessings!

Blessed Be,
Priestess Najah

The Art of Being Pagan/Winter Solstice

2011-12-17T08:10:00.000-07:00

Deep thoughts.

I am blessed to live in Colorado, in Denver specifically where the Pagan community is rich and alive. Each year on the Winter Solstice we gather at Red Rocks Amphitheatre and drum up the Sun. It is a sacred time, a pilgrimage to give thanks to the returning light and the start of winter.

I rise early, the morning still dark and very quiet, the sky blanketed with stars and this year, the Moon. I get excited knowing I'll see my brothers and sisters, families and friends. I love the drive in the quiet of the morning, the headlights and taillights all quietly making their way to Red Rocks.

I feel connected as we walk to the top of Red Rocks and the sound of drums touches my Spirit. It is very hard to put the experience into words. I always bring my rattles and my little cauldron to burn incense. We settle in and I began to shake and rattle, as my Spirit flies out to greet the dawn and a peace and serenity settles over me that only this moment can bring.

Sometimes its tough being Pagan in a modern, Christian - God -centered society. Nobody wishes us a Happy or Blessed Yule, except within own our communities. When we burn a Yule log during the longest night, its because we are honoring the sacredness of the change of seasons. We recognize the beauty and sacredness of Nature, which turns our world. And me personally, I honor the Divine Feminine, which I call Goddess.

During the Holidays, I love seeing the houses lit up and decorated. In my heart I give thanks because whether one is Christian or Pagan, we all are giving thanks for the Light. I believe we instinctively know our ancestors sat in darkness and waited for the light to return, thus giving way to metaphors and modern celebrations.

Its been a dark period for me. I'm looking forward to rising early, joining with my family and friends and drumming up the Sun, then gathering for some well earned hot breakfast.

May we all be blessed this Holiday Season.

Blessed Be,
Priestess Najah

Winter Solstice, Blessed Yule!

2011-12-14T10:26:00.000-07:00

The Solstice is coming! If you're in Denver don't miss "Drumming Up The Sun" at Red Rocks on 12/22/11. Blessed Yule, Happy Holidays!

Updating My Website

2011-12-14T10:18:00.000-07:00

I'm re-tooling my website www.craftandconjure.com and my Priestess Najah Facebook page. I'm looking forward to building new bridges, new connections and maintaining old bridges and relationships. I'm excited about new opportunities and better ways to be of service. Several pages are now under construction and are being updated for the New Year.

Blessed Be!
Priestess Najah

Happy Thanksgiving, Love, Joy and Gratitude!

2011-11-24T08:07:00.000-07:00

Happy Thanksgiving, love, joy, and gratitude! A Thanksgiving post for you at https://www.facebook.com/PriestessNajah

Bright Blessings!

Today's Meditation Message

2011-11-17T09:05:00.000-07:00

Today's meditation message - "Take responsiblity for your own happiness".

Blessed Be. :)

Message From This Morning's Meditation

2011-11-16T11:20:00.000-07:00

Message from this morning's meditation - Be without shame, be without guilt, be without regret. I feel so much better now. A clean wind is blowing!

Blessed Be!

Sand Creek Massacre - 13th Annual Spiritual Healing Run

2011-11-16T08:08:00.000-07:00

On November 29, 1864, volunteers from the 1st and 3rd Colorado Regiments attacked an encampment of Cheyenne and Arapaho along Sand Creek. Over 150 Indians were killed in the attack, most of whom were women, children, or elderly. - Sand Creek Massacre Historic Site http://www.nps.gov/sand/historyculture/stories.htm

The 13th Annual Sand Creek Massacre Spiritual Healing Run begins Thursday
November 24, 2011, at the Sand Creek Massacre National Historic Site. The run is
an annual event coordinated by the Northern Cheyenne Tribe of Montana with
support from the Northern Arapaho Tribe of Wyoming, the Southern Cheyenne and
Arapaho Tribes of Oklahoma, the National Park Service, Town of Eads, Kiowa
County, the Denver organizing committee, and History Colorado to honor those
killed at the massacre. This year's event marks the 147th Anniversary of the
Sand Creek Massacre.

Activities associated with the run will commence with a Prayer Ceremony at the
Sand Creek Massacre National Historic Site. The event will conclude in the
afternoon of Saturday, November 26, on the steps of the west lawn of the
Colorado State Capitol, followed by a reception for participants at the Denver
Indian Center.

Schedule of events: (all times are approximate)
Thursday, Nov. 24
9 AM - Pipe Ceremony and prayer at the Sand Creek Massacre National Historic
Site 55411 County Road W - Approximately 8 miles north of the intersection of
Kiowa County Road 54 and State Highway 96, near the town of Chivington CO.
Runners will be blessed and the annual Spiritual Healing Run to Denver will
commence, followed by a meal in Eads, CO.
Friday, Nov. 25
7 AM - Sunrise Ceremony – To Be Determined, The `Healing Run' will continue on
to Denver.
7 PM - Candlelight Vigil at the Denver Art Museum Wheel sculpture,100 West 14th
Avenue Parkway, Denver, CO.
Saturday, Nov. 26

8 AM - Honoring Ceremony at Riverside Cemetery, 5201 Brighton Boulevard, Denver,
for Captain Silas Soule, and Lt. Joseph A. Cramer, U.S. Army. Both men
instructed their troops not to fire at the massacre.
9 AM - Continue `Healing Run' from Riverside Cemetery to 15th and Arapahoe,
Denver, CO.
9:50 AM – At 15th and Arapahoe — near the site where Captain Silas Soule was
assassinated — the runners will join with walkers and continue on to the
Colorado State Capitol Building.
11 AM - Presentation on the steps of the Colorado State Capitol Building (West
Lawn side) 4 miles distance – MUST REGISTER TO RUN
Noon reception - Location To Be Determined
For additional information about the Annual Sand Creek Massacre Spiritual
Healing Run/Walk, please call run organizer Otto Braided Hair (406) 749 4325.

Blessed Be.

Unique Holiday Gifts

2011-11-13T08:11:00.000-07:00

Looking for a unique Holiday gift? Let me dress and fix a 7 day candle for you or your loved ones. Candles are customized to the astrological sign, cycle of the Moon and condition - such as prosperity, healing, blessing, protection, cleansing or safe travel. Only $15.00 at
http://www.craftandconjure.com/products

Blessed Marie LaVeau

2011-11-11T08:46:00.000-07:00

Today I finally take down my Halloween Samhain decorations. As this was a time of fun and frivolity, and also a sacred time of honoring our Ancestors, I share this photo of my offering to Blessed Marie LaVeau, left at her tomb on 10/31/11 in New Orleans, LA. I have been very blessed by her Spirit, and I give thanks.

Follow me on Facebook!

2011-11-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

My Priestess Najah page is now up and running on Facebook! Follow me on Facebook at:
www.Facebook.com/PriestessNajah

I'm A BootCamp Momma

2011-08-26T12:52:00.003-06:00

My twenty-year old son went off to Bootcamp this week. He's in the Army National Guard stationed at Fort Benning, Georgia.

My heart is broken, my world turned upside down, my center off-balance. Even though we prepared for this day, since he was a toddler, nothing can quite prepare you to see your grown up child walking down the street with a Military duffle bag slung over his shoulder.

We're a proud family and we're very proud of our son. I know he's going to be a successful soldier. He's made for it and he choose this path all on his own. And yet, knowing that he could potentially be put into harm's way strikes terror in the deepest part of my soul. Yet we have our faith. The Goddess walks with us, shines Her light down upon us, and lights our days with Her golden Sun.

I took a walk today and saw yellow leaves in the trees, which means the Wheel is turning. Not only in Nature is the Wheel turning, but my life is turning too. Our son is in the National Guard and our daughter is in her junior year of college. Regardless of our faiths and belief systems, I feel lots of parents can empathize with my feelings and it's this camaraderie that sustains me.

I found on Facebook a page for Fort Benning and also a page for parents of New Recruits. I used to be a Facebook snob, not wanting to join or become a Social Networker. But I am so grateful for Facebook and for people who share and post about their lives, accomplishments and struggles. I've found Pagan support, friends, life support and community on Facebook.

I was extremely grateful to also find Circle Sanctuary's Military Pagan Prayer Cards online. The prayer spoke to my heart and soothed my soul. I have a candle lit for our son with the prayer underneath. As soon as we receive his mailing address, I'll send him the prayer card. My son was also happy to find Pagan support within the Military. It was awesome to see forums, chatrooms and support for Military Pagans. I am grateful to all the people who have worked so tirelessly to bring us into the light and have support for our faith, beliefs and way of life.

I also made my son a safe travel mojo to carry with him. It makes me feel good knowing he's got it with him.

Today I'm still raw and trying to keep it together. We missed his first phone call home so we're all a little bummed today. But I took a walk and talked to the trees, listened to some music and felt a little better. I'm also keeping up my martial arts practice and that's a big help too.

I send blessings to all with children and family in the Military. And thank you all for reading my blog.

Blessed Be,
Najah

Altar for President Obama

2011-08-03T12:29:00.000-06:00

As Priestess Najah, I've been keeping an altar for President Barack Obama since November 2009. Recently over the past few Moon cycles, I've had trouble keeping the light going on the altar. I've cleaned the altar, added new herbs and powders, lit the candles on different days and still nothing worked. I attributed this to lots of negativity and bad juju being sent President Obama's way.

I may not always agree with our President or his policies or decisions, but it has become my Charge to keep this altar for his entire term, and thus I am doing so. So after trying all I knew to keep the light going, I contacted my good friend Dr. Christos Kioni and he helped me out! Dr. K suggested I move the altar. So after waiting for the appropriate time and using divination, I moved the altar to its new home.

I'm pleased to say the candle is now burning the strongest and brightest it has burned in a long time. Thanks so much Dr. Kioni for your help, you ROCK!
When I began this altar I offered to light a light from my altar, for anyone who would also like to the keep the light going. If you would like a candle lit from my altar, just send me an email. You will need to provide your own candle.

Peace and Blessings to us all.

The Full Moon is Calling

2011-06-15T08:17:00.001-06:00

"Whenever ye have need of anything, once in the month and better it be when the Moon is Full..." the words from the Charge of the Goddess, repeating over and over again in my head. I am brooding and snake like today, feeling in a slight trance. It's the Full Moon tonight as well as a total Lunar Eclipse. We won't be able to see it in North America, but we will feel it and I am feeling it already.

Its a night of endings and new beginnings as was revealed to me in my prayer and meditation this morning. How appropriate for this night as the Moon delves into the shadow and emerges from the light. A true metaphor for any changes one may going through. Tonight is a night to delve into the shadows of your life, look at them breathe them and then let them go. And once you have let them go, emerge into the light, shedding your former self and embrace the newness of Spirit that has come to you.

Once this night has passed the Moon will begin to wane, so I find myself retreating into myself, merging with the Magick that has been created on this night. It will be a time of internal integration of Spiritual messages and dreams. Add to that the Summer Solstice occurs on Tuesday. What a magickal period!

Blessed Be,
Najah

The Snake and The Dog

2011-05-26T06:19:00.002-06:00

I don't particularly like snakes, but I don't exactly dislike them either. I would say I respect them and have a morbid curiosity about them. I know snake shed has some very potent spiritual powers and is thus used in Hoodoo and Craft spells alike. I also know its one of my Kung Fu forms.
I love dogs. Dogs rock. They're loyal protectors and members of the family.
I have a dear friend who has both a dog and snakes. The dog and snakes have gotten along for a long time, that is until last night.
My friend who is a gracious snake keeper and truly loves her snakes was helping me to get to know them better. For the first time in my life I held two snakes tonight and let them crawl around my arms. Her snakes are boa constrictors.
The first snake was warm and tame and felt warm against my chest. I was surprised how peaceful I felt just letting it rest in my arms and against my body. My heartbeat slowed down and I could feel it's heart beating at the same time. Very awesome experience. I held him for a while and we returned it to it's cage.

Next came the larger boa constrictor. This snake was quite a bit bigger than the first one and had a beautiful sepia pattern on its body. I wasn't ready to completely hold this one, but I did let it crawl over my leg while she held the rest of it's body in her arms. While we had the snake out, the dog was also around, close to the snake. I remarked how impressed I was that the snakes and the dog got along.
After a while the snake was returned to its cage. However, we took the snake back out for few minutes to look at some interesting markings on its skin. I was feeling pretty great about the entire experience. In the Medicine Cards the snake is the symbol of transmutation, the sign of alchemy, very heavy magick indeed. I was fascinated with the warmth of its body and its strength, although I could not bring myself to look into its eyes.
Next thing we know the snake draws it's head back and bites the dog in the nose! Oh my! This has never happened before. The dog was ok, mostly shaken up and we felt awful. It was surreal. One moment we all sitting pleasantly and the next moment, strike! I had never felt or seen anything like it. The snake bit the dog as it was crawling over our legs.
Of course the snake went back in it's cage. The snake came to the window and peered out. The dog went to the window and looked in, as if to say "Hey buddy, why did you bite me ?", the dog being true to it's loyal and forgiving self. The snake said, "Hey, I'm a snake".

Dusty Ole Magickal Books

2011-05-23T16:13:00.000-06:00

I wandered. I decided to stop in at my favorite used bookstore, "Westside Books" http://www.westsidebooks.com/
Lois, the owner greeted me. It was good to see her as we hadn't seen each other in while. We start chatting it up and lo and behold my husband comes around the corner! (Big smile, kisses of joy). "Did you know he was here?" asks Lois. "No, I didn't, we came here separately" I replied (big smile).
The magick has begun for me at Westside Books, again. I love this bookstore. New, used and rare books stacked floor to ceiling, cramped aisles with old chairs, stacks on the floor, aisles crammed so high and wide with books, you can't see over them. Just my kind of place.
Today, I tell myself, lets check out some other aisles of the store before heading to my favorite section, the Metaphysical section. So I did. I wandered and browsed, gabbed some more with Lois and had a great time, just allowing myself to be led to my section when the time was right.
I finally make my way to the metaphysical section. It has scattered light peeking in between all the dusty used books and smells of old paper. I love the smell of old paper in books.
I'm drawn to a book on the Tarot. I'd been thinking of getting a new Tarot book for a while and there it was. As I thumbed through the book, I could tell we were a match. I decided to sit on an old blue, chair and take a better a look. Thumbing through the pages, I come to a receipt and this is what it says:
"Seven Rays Book Store...May 23, 1995"! Wow. Amazing. A 16 year old receipt in perfect condition. Hmmm. One plus six= 7, total price for the book today..$7.00 :)

I googled the store and it still exists.
http://sevenrays.com/
Lois says she gets her goosebump quota when I visit her store. Yeah, me too, Lois, me too! I know more shall unfold from this journey today.

Blessed Be.

Disenchanted and Disillusioned

2011-05-20T13:06:00.002-06:00

I had a dream. It started in 2000 when I took a certificate class in Herbal Medicine. It was the first time I touched the Earth in a magickal way through herbs and instantly I knew I was home. I was with women who were passionate about herbs and healing and felt this was definitely the place for me. I soaked up the knowledge like water, my soul had been parched and thirsty for the comradeship of women healers and Earth knowledge for what had seemed like forever.

While I was in that class I met some Occultists, Witches, Seers and Pagans, and even had my own supernatural experience with a ghost. I felt open, ready and willing to learn more, see more, and help others. Being an avid reader, I immersed myself in books on herbs, healing, The Craft, and Spirituality. I learned to read Medicine Cards and the Tarot.

In 2001, I became an Ordained Minister through Universal Brotherhood Movement. I did so, because a dear friend asked me to wed her and her beloved in New York. Applying for ordination and receiving it was a huge spiritual change in my life and I loved performing weddings. Its one of my favorite things to do and a gift from my friend that keeps on giving.

From there, I joined a Drum Circle where I really got introduced to The Goddess, the Wheel of the Year and ritual. I can still see the hall, lit with candles, smelling transcendent of white sage and all the drums in the Circle. It was a dream come true. Again I knew I was home. I was with Mother Drum Circle for eight years and it was a sad day indeed when it came to a close.

And then in 2008 I stepped into the Hoodoo. Hoodoo came to me on a business trip to New Orleans. Returning home I found cat yronwode's book in a spiritual supply store and it changed my life. I read the inside cover and again I knew I was home. Here was a place where I could put my herbal knowledge, my spirituality and my desire to help others to good use. I was excited to learn and be a part of such a cultural legacy. I knew I was on the right track. I enrolled in her course, studied hard and graduated. During my first week in the course, I met my first real practicing Witch.

I asked if she would teach me, leading me to initiation. That led to a Year and a Day study and she dumped me 3 months shy of completing the goal without any explanation. I continued on my own and self-dedicated. I tried to start my own Circle - not coven, just a group of women meeting together to honor the Goddess, the old ways and the Moon. That died.
Next I tried to study with Elder in the community. That fizzled out. Each time I tried to touch with the Goddess and set out on the path of initiation it failed. The latest failure happened this week as I prepared for a ceremony. Every time I tried to set a date for the ceremony something went wrong or the date wasn't available.

I don't understand why the path to the Craft of the Wise is so difficult. Has the Goddess forsaken me? Does she not want new followers in her Craft? Three years I have knocked on her door and each answer has left me fallen on my face, sad, disillusioned and disenchanted.

I have gone back in my heart and mind to what I feel drawn to, called to. I feel called to the Moon. I love the Moon. I worship with the Moon, I find my Divinity in the Moon. Perhaps the Goddess I have been seeking is not the one of the Craft of the Wise. Perhaps She exists in my Moon, in whom my heart always find a home.

My birthday is next Saturday. A time of rebirth and renewal. I plan to immerse myself in the sacred waters of a healing mineral spring. I hope when I come up for air a new sense of purpose and direction will be made known to me.

Blessed Be.

Love, Love, Lucky Mojo!

2011-05-03T11:45:00.001-06:00

A year ago this week I was on my way to San Francisco, CA to visit a dear friend and attend the Lucky Mojo Hoodoo Weekend and Workshops. I was so happy to be back in my dear Cali, the home of my childhood. I never spent much time in Northern California, so I was excited to be exploring Sonoma County, the beautiful land of trees and vineyards. While there I took a beautiful drive to the ocean, which I will never forget. There is a haunting beauty that never leaves you, as you drive throught the forest and then emerge at the ocean.

I was like a giggly schoolgirl the morning of the Hoodoo Workshop weekend. I had studied hard to graduate from cat yronwode's Hoodoo Rootwork Correspondence Course in 2008. From the first moment I entered into relationship with her, through her books, I had known I was home. Now to think I was just a few miles from meeting her in person and seeing Lucky Mojo with my own eyes. I could hardly stand it.

I drove the beautiful winding road from Guerneville to Forestville. I parked and walked up to the path that leads to Lucky Mojo Curio Co. I was hit with the sight of lush green plants and trees, and roses. Oh the beautiful roses! Luckily you can see it to, through my Youtube Video:

I won't be attending this year, as my travels are taking me overseas, for the first time in my life! I am so excited to be getting off the North American continent!
However I will miss being with cat and the wonderful Lucky Mojo staff, and all my colleagues from the Association of Independent Readers and Rootworkers (AIRR), eleven of whom are attending this year! I wish each and every one of them a wonderful, blessed and prosperous weekend. I will be with them in Spirit.
If you're in the area, be sure to stop by Lucky Mojo, for which you will be abundantly blessed!

Najah

Happy May Day, Blessed Beltane!

2011-05-01T07:56:00.000-06:00

I give credit to CelestialElf for this wonderful Beltane Video. Happy May Day, Blessed Beltane to you!

Fairy Tales Do Come True

2011-04-29T09:42:00.000-06:00

I woke this morning at 4:00 a.m. to watch the wedding of Prince William to Kate Middleton, now Princess Catherine. I was completely enchanted and awed by the ceremony. It was as if all the story books I read as a little girl, became real and I too was present at the ceremony.

My husband questioned how I could be so enthralled in what is clearly a Christian ceremony, steeped in a thousand year lineage. It was easy for me to put aside religious differences and simply bask in the happiness and joy of a royal wedding. As a romantic medieval enthusiast there were many things that made my heart cheer:

First as an African American Witch, I was proud to see Black children in the choir and Black people in the crowd, and Black men in the calvary. We are often left out in European history and it was awesome to see us in included in the ceremony and cheering on the celebration.

Then there were the green trees in the Abbey, the pictures of the Virgin Mary, the handfasting during the ceremony, and the old english being spoken. I knew the Goddess was there even though Her name was never mentioned. And as was quoted by Selena Fox on Facebook, they are definitely the May Queen and King of Beltane. The timing couldn't be any more appropriate. Did they secretly know this? I wondered how many people were actually saying Pagan prayers as was I during the ceremony.

To add to the magick of the morning, when I did turn and look out my front window, there was the crescent Moon shining brightly in the eastern dawn. Words fail me to describe the beauty of the moment.

I wish Prince William and Princess Catherine much happiness, love, peace and blessings. I was a big fan of Princess Diana, and I know she would have been very proud of her sons today.

Blessed Be.

Beltane Cometh!!

2011-04-27T11:29:00.000-06:00

Happy Day, Happy May Day, Blessed Beltane! The Green Man cometh and the Goddess prepares to receive his seed!

Ok, so what I am babbling on about? May is coming! In my tradition we celebrate Beltane, May 1st, the day the Green Man gives his seed to the Mother and she in turn births her children. We dance the Maypole and celebrate!

In non-Pagan terms this means the seeds of summer, the forthcoming harvest, have been planted and the Earth has received them. Flowers and fruits will burst forth from the Earth, and we the Earth's children will delight in the abundance and the harvest.
The other day I was speaking with a dear friend, who has been busy fixing up her home and garden. I shared with her that she was nesting, like a pregnant woman, readying for birth. Have you noticed how everyone is cleaning up their yards and getting excited for warmer days and green growing things?! Even without knowing it, folks are following the cycle of Nature. Preparing their homes and yards for the season that is approaching. We're all celebrating Nature!

Blessed Be and Happy Beltane!

Holy Mother of God

2011-04-25T09:45:00.000-06:00

I had a tough time yesterday. I've been having tough times with Christian Holidays as of late, and yesterday was an all time whopper.

I generally consider myself to be an easy going person, respecting others rights to worship and paths to the Divine as I wish them to respect mine. But Easter really gets me going. As a devotee of the Goddess, its the one day that brutally reminds me of the misogynist nature of the patriarchal religion of this country and the western world. It chaps my hide and makes me grit my teeth. And then I feel guilty and feel as if I'm no better than them for having such feelings. So I prayed the Serenity prayer. I thought I need to find a better way to deal with these feelings. Let me be peaceful and open and try to let go and let live. No sooner did I pray those words, the tv program "60 Minutes" airs the below episode:

"Mt. Athos A Visit to the Holy Mountain"

I was intrigued. For the first time ever, the monks at Mt. Athos allowed tv cameras to film their monastery. I was falling into the serenity of Mt. Athos and the monks commitment to their faith. I appreciated the rituals, the dedication, the beauty, and how people can still petition the monastery for admittance, and live the life of a devoted monk. And then a monk uttered these words (paraphrasing) - he was being asked about women...they (the monks) revere the Mother of God, but women are not allowed on the premises, never have been, never will be..they'll bring their kids and families and then it will become a tourist attraction and the silence will be broken.

My mouth literally hung open, I was appalled. No wonder they never wanted cameras there! Seems to me Mt. Athos=misogyny, which I was interested to learn originates from the Greek (!) word misogunia which means to hate women. Apparently women are good enough to be the Mother of the God but not good enough to set foot on Mt. Athos!

So there was my answer. I was saddened but clear. And now I have clear seeing as to why I walk the path of the Goddess, the Holy Mother of God and Her ways, which open my heart, connect me to Nature and lift me to the Divine.

Blessed Be.

Blessed Earth Day

2011-04-22T08:20:00.000-06:00

"Blessed Mother, Divine Mother,
On this day we thank you for the Sun which shines upon us,
The Rain that pours down upon us,
The Night that cloaks us,
The Moon that lights us,
And your body which sustains us.

I thank you for the sunny days which make me smile and the cloudy days that make me frown.
I thank you for teaching me balance, That day follows night, calm follows storm.
I thank you for your beautiful oceans and all the glorious creatures that live and swim in your waters.
I thank you for all beings, human, winged, four-legged, hoppers, runners, jumpers, and the ones that creep me out!
And most of all, thank you for beautiful butterflies.
Thank you for taking the bodies of those whom I have loved, resting them and returning them to your body, from whence we all come.
Blessed Mother, Divine Mother, Happy Earth Day to You."

Najah Lightfoot Bagley, Sister, Woman, Priestess

Sunday Attitude

2011-04-17T10:40:00.000-06:00

I've got a Sunday attitude and it ain't good right now. That's cause I'm working on a Sunday and it really annoys me. I've never liked working on Sundays. I grew up with Sundays meaning taking it slow, cooking pancakes, reading comics, watching tv. Now as a grown up I still want to do those things and throw hangin' with my hubby in the mix. As I write this a guilty voice speaks in my head, reminding me to be grateful that I have a job, especially when so many people are out of work and living in desperate economic times. Ok, I hear that and I still don't like working on Sundays!

Last night I celebrated the Full Moon with my sisters. We had a wonderful time. I love celebrating the Full Moon. I get all charged up when I'm prepping for Circle. I love driving to our meeting place seeing the Full Moon in the sky, knowing that in just a little while, I'll be entering into sacred communion with Her.

I recently finished a great book - "High Priestess" by Patricia Crowther. It's one of the best books I've read on the Craft and the history of the Craft Renaissance. I really liked how Ms. Crowther was so forthcoming in her book. I find a lot of books of the Craft to be simplistic and lacking in meaningful detail. I highly recommend this book for your library.

This morning the Goddess Sarasvati appeared in my cards. She told me I needed to surround myself with beautiful music and be creative. Spurned on by a really nice comment on my blog (thank you!!) I put in the headphones and decided to write. Now I'm glad I did.

I hope wherever you are today, you are having a good Sunday.

Peace and Blessings to you,
Najah

Taking Control of My Blog

2011-04-14T14:55:00.000-06:00

I've been dickin' around with my blog for a while. For a while I was stymied because I felt that if I didn't include pictures with my blog, no one would read it. Then my friend David gave me permission to write without adding pictures to every entry. I thought to myself, do I choose books based on the pictures? I left choosing books for pictures a long time ago. I hope my blog will still be well recieved with or without pictures.

My next stumbling block has been trying to update my Blogger settings. UGH! For months I've been trying to remove blogs I no longer follow from my Reading List. I don't know about you but when I open Blogger to write, if I see something I don't like, it distracts me from writing. But today, success! I was finally able to remove the unwanted blogs. YAY!

So, I'm back to blogging. For me, blogging is an extension of journaling, which I have done consistently since I was 8 years old. Only difference is my journals are private and my blogs are public. Fortunately for my reading public I hope to have worked out my "stuff" in my journals before I clog up my blog with stuff.

I want to thank the 8 people who have hung with me on my blog. I know if you turn the number 8 on it's side, its the sign for infinity. So here's to infinity and beyond!

Najah

Goddess Abundantia, Goddess of Prosperity and Abundance

2011-02-18T13:47:00.000-07:00

I use the Goddess Oracle cards by Doreen Virtue in my prayer and meditation. I've been a big a fan of her's since I read the Lightworker's Way several years ago. Doreen Virtue's insight and intution have brought big blessings into my life and I am grateful.

The latest blessing came from my work with the benovelent Goddess, Abundantia. The Goddess Abundantia turned up in my daily reading about a month ago. I read her story and truly felt inspired and blessed by her goodness.

Later I found a wonderful invocation to her, which I performed and placed upon my money altar:

http://www.themessenger.info/archive/MayJun2003/Doreen%20Virtue.html

Well, lo and behold my arms are open and the heavens have poured out their blessings to me! This week my vehicle needed an air bag repair. The repair was valued at $900.00. The dealership decided the defect was due to the construction of the vehicle, so I was charged $0.00! To add to my blessings, an enormous medical bill which I was in the beginning stages of an appeal was miraculously wiped out. The agency to which the bill was due decided in my favor and accepted the money that had already been the insurance company, thus making my balance owed $0.00 and saving me $1700.00! Blessed Be!

So on this day of the Full Moon, I bow and give thanks to the Goddess Abundantia and thank her for her benovelent blessings in my life.

Blessed Be,
Najah
http://www.craftandconjure.com/
http://www.readersandrootworkers.org/

This Week's Magick

2011-02-06T23:01:00.000-07:00

Tonight the Moon is a silver sliver in the sky. I wait in anticipation for the first sign of the Moon in the night sky. It always takes my breath away to see the Crescent Moon. I'm always aware of the Moon's presence or absence in the sky. Seeing the Moon in the night sky brings me comfort.

I recently performed a house cleansing/blessing. The cleansing/blessing was for a roommate situation that had gone sour and the person wanted some fresh, good energy in their home. I enjoy performing these types of works, as I too am uplifted by the work. I love the intense pungent smell of cleansing incense and I like seeing the candles lit in the rooms that I've passed through. Best of all I enjoy seeing the people I'm working for peaceful and happy when the work is done.

We're in a New Moon, waxing cycle. This is a time for works of increase and abundance. We had a great start to this new cycle. How auspicious for Chinese New Year, Year of the Rabbit and Imbolc to occur at the same time! My mind has begun to think about all the great upcoming spring and summer festivals. Although I love winter, I also enjoy dancing and twirling about with my friends. Its so nice to celebrate and have rituals for all the seasons.

Peace and Blessings,
Najah
www.craftandconjure.com
www.readersandrootworkers.org

Blessed Imbolc

2011-02-02T09:17:00.000-07:00

Today the Wheel Turns and we recognize and honor Brigid, the Goddess of secrets, initiation, fire and light. Most of the country is submerged in snow and ice. Here in Denver its a sacred -13 degrees.

When I woke this morning the Earth was quiet and snow is still on the ground. I was conscious of the sacredness of this day. Instead of turning on all the lights, I lit my blessed candle from Kildare, Ireland from the flame of St. Brigid, and felt the warmth of the promise of hope. Renewed hope in the knowledge that albeit we are cold and the Earth in most parts of the Northern Hemisphere, is covered in snow, seeds are germinating, Spring is on its way.

In another time and place, I see myself wandering down a path in a snow covered forest. I make my way to altar where a single white candle burns bright. I lay my offerings at the altar. I remove my hood and notice a fire a burns strong and bright in the center of the Circle. I throw sacred herbs into the fire and they crackle and spark. Forest creatures gather at the outskirts of my Circle to witness and celebrate this sacred day with me. I lift my arms to the skies, as I cry out Blessed Imbolc, Beloved Goddess, Blessed Be!

Blessed Be.

Najah
http://www.craftandconjure.com/
http://www.readersandrootworkers.org/

This Week's Magick

2011-01-26T23:21:00.000-07:00

A spider bit me. It bit me right on my neck, otherwise known as the throat chakra. The bite left also left me with a swollen lymph node on my neck, which is very painful. The bite is large enough that you can actually see two black dots where the spider sunk it's fangs into my neck. Ouch and creepy. I've been to the doctor and she felt the bite was significant enough to warrant a tetanus shot. Now I've got a sore neck and a sore arm.

But moving in the realms that I do, I know there is more to this spider bite than just the physical. As one of my dear magickal sisters reminded me, "what is spider trying to tell you?". Hmmmm.

I know from my training as a reader of Medicine Cards that Grandmother Spider comes to tell you to "write!" Put it down on paper! I am a lifelong journaler, but I've been hit and miss at keeping up my blog. I guess she finally got my attention, so with that I'm making a commitment to post to my blog, at least once a week. Guess my throat chakra has a lot to say. So here we go, may we enjoy the ride.

This Week's Magic

I worked for 2 clients this week. I'm in a long term work for a client who has a substantial court case. Several times a week I light a candle on her honey jar and pray for her success, in accordance with the will of my Higher Power - the Divine Mother Goddess and for the highest good of all concerned. It fills my soul to work Hoodoo for people. I have been blessed with a great gift and I am honored to be able to work for those in need.

I also crafted a cleansing package for a client who needs to let go of some yucky stuff in her life. Oh, everything smelled so wonderful! I dressed and fixed a 7 day vigil candle with strong cleansing herbs of rosemary, eucalyptus and peppermint. I also made a condition oil and bath salt for her.

On the spiritual side, we are coming up on Imbolc, one of the great Sabbats of the Pagan/Wiccan calendar. This year Imbolc is celebrated on February 2, which is also Groundhog's day. Imbolc celebrates the heralding of Spring and St. Brigid. Even though in most parts of the country, snow still covers the ground, we know that the Earth is stirring. Seeds are germinating and the first blooms of flowers are just around the corner. Adding even more magick to this day is the fact that it is also the New Moon!

Peace and Blessings,
Najah
http://www.craftandconjure.com/
http://www.readersandrootworkers.org/

The Birth of The Sun

2010-12-20T08:36:00.000-07:00

Today is the eve of the Winter Solstice. Tonight is especially auspicious because as of the Witching Hour, the Moon will be full, a total lunar eclipse will be in progress, and Winter will come in it's full being in the Northern hemisphere of our blessed Earth.

I'm giddy with excitement. I can feel the surge and anticipation as the Great Mother is in labor, preparing to give life and rebirth to the Sun. And for the third year in a row I will be joining with others to drum up the Sun at beautiful, magickal, majestic, Red Rocks Park.

I can feel the night and darkness coming, the womb of creation preparing itself for its glorious moment of birth. I am grateful for my intune-ness with the cycles of the Earth and the Mysteries of the Universe. I am grateful I have found my path as a Pagan and Witch, and that I have such a wonderful community with which to celebrate these special days.

It nice to know we start the season. First comes the Solstice then Christmas. I have the giddyness of a little kid, and the understanding of a Pagan. Finally things make sense to me that I had questioned for so long. Why the tree, why evergreen, why lights? I have the blessing to have walked different religious paths as a Christian, and then a Muslim, before finally arriving here. Today I am grateful for the path of Seeker, which I walked for so long. Now I am at peace, joyful and serene.

Blessed Be.

Seven Days Until Halloween!

2010-10-23T15:37:00.000-06:00

According to my ticker, its 7 days until Halloween. I'm getting so excited I can hardly stand it. Tonight is the 19th Annual Denver Witches' Ball and for the second year in a row, I will be participating in the opening ritual.

I remember last year, how scared I was to be in public, calling the quarters. We had a great opening ritual and everything went fine. This year I don't have the jitters as bad, except that I lead off the quarters by starting with Air, my personal element being the Gemini that I am.

I'm also excited because as fate would have it, I am able to stay until the midnight ritual. I've never been able to participate in the midnight ritual due to my work schedule. So the Ball indeed looks good from my perspective this year!

Following the Ball, the next weekend a dear friend of mine is holding a Day of the Dead party. I am very honored that she felt so inspired after attending my party for the last few years, that she has decided to hold her own. I'll be going over early to help her set up her altar and the energies for a fabulous night.

The next day, my Circle and I will have Samhain dinner and ritual at my home. I'm very excited about this, as I've wanted to hold a formal Samhain dinner for years. It will be so nice to actually sit down and enjoy dinner with my Circle and family.

I hope that you too are getting excited about the Season and having fun making plans, going to parties, or just hanging out with your loved ones.

Blessed Be,
Sister Najah

Remembering Those We Love - Samhain (Your Halloween)

2010-10-04T22:20:00.000-06:00

A dear and beloved friend passed away yesterday. He was like a brother to us, a friend to our son, a great person, wonderful father and he is deeply missed. I write this piece in memory of Chad Blatt.

Halloween is coming. I can feel it the air and most everywhere I go, homes are decorated with Witches, ghosts, spider webs and monsters. Pumpkins are for sale as well as gobs of candy. But my heart isn't there, it's grieving over the passing of our beloved Chad.

I'm grateful that as a practicing Witch, I know the real meaning of Halloween, which we call Samhain. It's nice to remember our ancestors and those who have gone before us. We hold a dumb supper and set a place for our loved ones who are now on the other side. How grateful am I to know this night is coming. And true, as we say the veil between the Seen and Unseen is thinnest at this time allowing us to commune with our Ancestors should we choose to. We light candles and fires for them to find their way as they come to be with us, should they choose. We ask them not to stay, and we call them not, we simply honor them and are grateful should they choose to visit us for a while on Samhain night.
I'm glad we have this night to honor our dead. I find our American culture is sorely lacking in Ancestor veneration and rememberance. We bury our dead, grieve and then move on. We're not supposed to talk about death and certainly not embrace it by setting a place for our passed on, loved ones at are table.
For years I've held a party on Halloween night, not only for Witches but for anybody who would like to come. No mistake we party, but we also take time to remember and honor everyone who has brought a memento of their loved one. Each year I am surprised and humbled by how many non-Witches want to attend and how many people get so filled by taking a turn a sharing about their loved ones who have passed on.
Another benefit I've received from holding my party is getting to know the ancestors of my friends. Each year my friendship deepens with my friends, by listening to them tell their stories of their loved ones on the other side. And isn't that what we're about, our stories, the threads of our lives?
So this year my heart is sad as I decorate my home for the Holiday, but I am also gladdened to know I will set a place for our beloved Chad, and wish him love.

Blessed Be.

Halloween Movie Time

2010-10-03T14:31:00.001-06:00

The Halloween movies have begun! I'm keeping a log of the movies I watch and rating them from 1-5 brooms, 5 being Witchtastic!

Today's movie "Hocus Pocus". I give it 4 brooms!

*** I'm a Disney fan, so I enjoyed the movie from that perspective, but unfortunately and subtly it promotes long held stereotyphes. I still think Bette Midler rocks, I want her dress! And Sarah Jessica Parker is just wonderful, and Kathy Najemy has the best hair.

Sittin' in the Cemetery

2010-09-08T21:42:00.000-06:00

I've been blessed to be a co-author, on the blog "Hoodoo Crossroads". Check out my latest post "Sittin' in the Cemetery":

http://hoodoocrossroads.wordpress.com

Blessed Be and Happy New Moon,
Najah

Friday the 13th Magick

2010-08-13T08:16:00.000-06:00

Today is Friday the 13th of August, 2010. As a practicing Witch, Hoodoo Rootworker, and believer in magick, I wake up tingly and excited about this day. I know that as there are possibly thousands of people who superstitious about this day, I for one am excited about the magick this day holds.

The number 13 is a sacred number in my world. I resonate to it as the number of lunar cycles in the year, which corresponds to the Full Moon esbats me and my Circle hold every year. It's the number of a powerful herb cleansing bath used in Hoodoo. It used to be the time most girls started their period.

I began this day early. I rose at 4:00 a.m. to witness the Perseid Meteor shower and oh what a display! As I softened my eyes I could see the sky lit up with meteors crisscrossing, zig zagging across the dark of the early morning. And then whoosh, a huge meteor went right across the sky. The stars were out, I could clearly see the Pleaides. It was truly a magickal moment.

I went back to bed to grab a little more sleep, before getting ready for work. I was excited to perform my daily prayer and meditation, where I often pull a tarot card. Imagine my surprise when I drew:

I am attuned to the magick and surprise of this day and night! Blessed Be!

Paring Beer with Ritual

2010-08-09T20:16:00.000-06:00

Over at The Juggler - I'm following Laura LaVoie's blog, who is discussing pairing beer with Sabbats. I've been enjoying her posts, especially because she's given me some different choices to mead and wine, since I'm not a big fan of either. While I enjoy mead, sometimes its too sweet and sticky, and red wine has always given me a headache.

Well for this Lammas, Laura recommended Mothership Wit from New Belgium Brewery, which is brewed right here in my Colorado. I like New Belgium for their Sunshine Wheat, but I had never heard of Mothership Wit. I'd thought I'd try it on the name alone.

Happy to say, I found some without any problem and it was our libation for Lammas celebration:

I enjoyed the light and smooth taste of Mothership Wit and have now added it to our lists of favorite beers. It was fun drinking beer for Lammas. We celebrated the harvest with wheat beer, fresh produce from our garden and the local market, and flowers from my flower beds.

I'm looking forward to Laura's post for Mabon.

End Trans
Blessed Be

Blessed Lammas

2010-08-01T08:25:00.000-06:00

Today is August 1st. The Wheel has turned and my emotions and body can sense the change in the air. Summer's highs are coming to a close. There is a solemn vibe in the air. Tonight we will feast and share drink, perhaps make a fire and contemplate the goodness the summer has brought. We will look forward to the upcoming fall and the cold days and nights that lie ahead.

That's my spiritual voice speaking. In truth I'm a warm weather girl. I love the sunshine and the flowers. I love being able to go outside without layers and no socks. I feel lifted and lightened by early mornings spent watering my garden. Oh how I love the sunny days!

The Summer has been a blast. Fun, fun, fun (!) days spent at the Renn Faire. The Moonlight Classic Bike ride with 3 to 4 thousand of my closest friends, and a private party at the Renn Faire, I shall never forget. These are the summer highs I look forward to all year and now the Wheel has turned. Am I feeling a bit sad? Yes a wee bit. The Witches Almanac used the word "bittersweet" to describe this day, and indeed that is a good word for my feelings.

Yet, I know the Wheel must turn. One of the best things about being a practicing Witch is knowing and anticipating these cycles. I know golden days of Fall are coming. I know Samhain is coming, and I'm already planning my celebration. I know sparkly, white, snowy days are coming. I love looking and walking in the Colorado snow, just not driving in it so much anymore.

So today our Pagan community will pause and honor the seasons and the turn of The Wheel.

Blessed Be.

End Trans.

Today's Magick

2010-07-10T10:30:00.000-06:00

I drew the Tower Tarot Card today. Ouch. Everytime that card turns up, I feel ice move in my belly. My thoughts race, "oh no, what bad news is coming, am I going to have a bad day, will I be able to handle it?"

I've chosen to balance my readings with cards from two other decks - The Goddess Oracle Cards by Doreen Virture and Medicine Cards by David Carson and Jamie Sams. Thankfully the Tower card was balanced by Mother Ishtar, telling me it's time to define my boundaries. So instead of a free fall from the Tower, with no parachute, I have Mother Ishtar guiding me down, helping me to land on my feet.

End Trans
BB (Blessed Be)

Everyday Magick

2010-07-05T18:19:00.000-06:00

I started this blog to chronicle all the magickal things that happen to me living a mundane life. I've been remiss in doing that as life has given me the blues lately. Today I'd like to remedy that by beginning to journal about the magickal, mystical things that happen to me on a daily basis. May they serve to ignite a little magick in the reader's life.

Bike ride July 5, 2010

Today my husband and I went for a bike ride. We decided to do something different by taking our bikes to the Montview neighborhood and riding around. It was a lovely day. Sun shining, and big green trees diffusing the light on wide avenues.

We set out to ride to Joseph's Fried Chicken on 29th and Fairfax. We got there but Joe was closed for the Holiday. No worries we'll definitely be back. As we took a spin around the North Park Hill neighborhood we came upon a magickal garden. The toilet caught our eye:

We got off our bikes and took a stroll and found the most wonderful, very well maintained magickal garden:

And then there was the shoe tree:

We finished with Peace on Earth:

Just a little Holiday bike ride brought magick into our lives.

Blessed Be (BB)
End Trans

Acute Minority Status Attack

2010-05-16T12:38:00.000-06:00

Last night my husband and I went to see a comedian at the Buell theatre. We were really pysched because magic happened when we were looking for tickets. We kept searching and searching and finally on the fifth try I got tickets in orchestra section. Imagine our surprise when we were seated in the third row from the stage! That was awesome, and now I am inspired to search for tickets to other concerts we are interested in attending.

But that is not the basis of this post. This post is about the other surprise I had at the concert. One that knocked me off my ass and made me stand up for myself.

The comedian is a nationally known act. We never once gave a thought to the potential audience that would attend the concert. Imagine my shock when we arrived at the Buell theatre, which seats almost 3,000 people and I was the only Black face in the crowd. The "ONLY". Imagine my horror as we sat down in the third row and I thought "uh-oh" this could be bad (My husband thinking the same thing) that my uniqueness could end up as part of the comedy act. Thankfully that never happened, but it took a lot for me to stay present in the show as I vascilliated between fear of being called out and fear of what the fuck am I doing here?

I live in a predominantly Anglo state. I know that. I'm married to an Irish-Scottish American. Yep got that too. But rarely do I find myself the ONLY brown face in a crowd or at an event. It was scary, it was creepy. I kept looking for another me but I never saw one.

I've been blessed that in my 50 years of living I've not been the victim of overt racisim. Subtle racisim sure, but I never let it slow me down. But last night was different. I felt fear in my cells. Cellular memories surfaced that have nothing to do with my lifetime, but the lifetimes of my ancestors. Nobody was mean or rude to me last night, but no one was openly friendly either. I could feel looks of "what are you doing here". I just tried to hold it together, when my fight or flight instincts were going into overdrive.

Funny thing though, that incident last night made me think about situations in my life where I have been unwilling to stand up for myself. Situations were I have played victim when really I have the strength and courage to strong.

I've learned to be a people pleaser. Perhaps people pleasing and being a minority go hand in hand. "Hey, just don't make waves and try to get along". Its easier. But where does that actually get you? Or some folks go the other way and walk around with chips on their shoulders, but that's no fun to be around either. So there must be a balance. Sometimes you go with the flow and sometimes you just have to say, that's enough of that!

So I said to myself after feeling fear in a new way, "that's enough of that!" and took care of some long standing issues that had been festering. Interesting how an acute attack of minority status brought me to strength.

End Trans.

A Quiet Room

2010-04-28T23:13:00.000-06:00

There's an ache where there used be a smile, concern, apprehension, caring, anxiety. Its been three weeks now since my son moved out and I miss him terribly.

I wake up with his name on my lips. Calling for him as if he's in trouble. My mind searching for him, but he's not here. He's in his own place. Where he should be, where its time for him to be, and yet all this intellectual knowledge doesn't soothe my heart.

I'll be candid. Relations with my own family are skewed, distant and weird. We just don't get each other.

But my relationship with my son is different. He's my flesh and blood and we're tight. We're close, we're friends.

He's in the city. He's not faraway, but there's definitely a change in our domicile. I know he's not just out, hanging out. He's on his own and he's most likely not coming back - to live. Which is I know how it should be and yet I still miss him.

I think of the parents who have lost their children. Whose children have died before them, or been lost or never come home. What a terrible, terrible, loneliness and ache that must be for them. A room silent, with only memories. A waiting that never goes away.

So in my empty nest grief, I find gratitude that my son is just a few miles away. I find gratitude that if I send him a text, he writes me right back, and trust that in time this too shall pass.

Blessed Be

End Trans 4/28/10

Blessed Day, Happy Earth Day

2010-04-22T09:34:00.005-06:00

Blessed Mother, Divine Mother,

On this day we thank you for the Sun which shines upon us,
The Rain that pours down upon us,
The night that cloaks us,
The Moon that lights us,
And your body which sustains us.

I thank you for the sunny days which make me smile, and the cloudy days that make me frown. I thank you for teaching me balance, that day follows night, that calm follows storm.
I thank you for your beautiful oceans and all the glorious creatures that live and swim in your waters.
I thank you for all beings human, winged, four-legged, hoppers, runners, jumpers, and the ones that creep me out!
I thank you for green meadows in which to lay my head
And most of all thank you for beautiful butterflies.
Thank you for taking the bodies of those I have loved, resting them and returning them to your body, from whence we all come.
Blessed Mother, Divine Mother
Happy Earth Day to You.

End Trans 4/22/10

Tituba, Salem and Me

2010-04-08T23:14:00.001-06:00

I recently donated to the World of Witches Museum. Its going to be located in Salem, MA and I adore Salem.

I believe I had a past life there. The first time I visited there I walked around with a prior knowledge of places and I dreamed true there, about mass burials in a grave. I donated to the Museum because on their Kickstarter page they said they would have an exhibit honoring Tituba. I like the title the author Maryse Condé gave her, "Tituba, the Black Witch of Salem".

I feel Tituba and I are Spirit Kin. I feel bonded to her, connected to her. So little is known about her, yet we know her presence, her knowledge, craft and magick ignited the Salem Witch Trials. I feel because of Tituba's strength and presence I can be the Witch I am today, and the Witch I hope to become. Tituba brought me to Hoodoo. She whispered in my ear and told me I could do it, and showed me that it was in my blood. Tituba was married to an American Indian man, and my grandfather was a full blood Cherokee. Tituba was a slave and so were my ancestors. We are connected.

I hope the World of Witches Museum reaches their goal. Our community, our world needs such a place. If Salem touches your heart, won't you consider donating too?

End Trans 4/8/10

A Place of His Own

2010-04-04T17:08:00.000-06:00

Our nineteen year old son announced to over the weekend that he was moving out. He's got a little piece of real estate in a place with a friend. Its a big day. Now granted knowing the stats for kids moving out and then moving back in are high, it was the ritual of the official moment that brought this Mom to tears.

His girl and his best friend showed up to help him pack. He took the necessities and said he'd back in a few days for other things. Being the good Witch and Conjurer that I am, I packed him a black bag full of goodies for a young wizard stepping out on his journey. It was hard not to really cry at that point, the moment was not lost on both of us. "You grew up when I wasn't looking", I remember saying.

So maybe he'll be back and maybe he won't. I know I never went back home after I left. That determined streak may be in him too. Time will tell. Either way, today was a moment marked in time, and I'm glad it came with love, happiness and celebration.

Now for that shot of whiskey.

End Trans 4/4/10

Muscles, Bones and Tissue

2010-03-31T22:10:00.000-06:00

It was a sunny day. The first real spring day in Denver. It was also the celebration of my 10th wedding anniversary and my husband and I decided to take an adventure. We went to see the Body Worlds exhibit at the Denver Museum of Natural History.

I was a little nervous and excited at the same time. In my youth, when I had dreams of being a physician, I visited cadaver labs. No need to go into details here, but lets just say it's an experience one never forgets. And the smell, oh. Enough said.

But we had heard excellent reviews about Body Worlds. Words like "brilliant, unforgettable, educational". So we bought our tickets and went to to see the bodies.

Upon arriving, I thought I smelled formaldehyde, but I realized it was my mind playing tricks on me. I guess I was expecting to smell it. I was actually glad there was no odor, no scent of any kind.

We had to show our tickets to two different groups of volunteers, before we gained admission to the exhibit. There were signs everywhere telling us there were no bathrooms inside the exhibit, and once you entered you had to go through the entire exhibit to exit. Ok, we were pretty psyched by now and and the thrill of what we were going to see was palpable.

As soon as we entered the exhibit hall our ears heard the sound of a deep heartbeat and it seemed we in a room of deep red. Thats the only way I can describe it. And then we saw our first body.

Muscles exposed, tendons, joints, bones. Its all there for the naked eye to see. Bodies in all different poses. Parts of bodies, pieces of bodies. Healthy parts, diseased parts. Awe inspiring, jaw dropping, "and what is that?" bodies.

Most of the bodies were male. When I saw my first woman I got a little emotional. Oh my gosh, thats what we look like inside. My awareness, love and respect for my body has changed tremendously. We are a creation of brilliance. We are a mind blowing creation and I shuddered at how some people have so little respect for our humanity.

I hope more people will go to the see the exhibit. My husband and I both feel it embodies the word "education'.

We may go back again before the exhibit closes or we may not. Either way we are better people, better humans for having had the experience and we hope others will too.

Here's a link to the exhibit in case you're interested:

http://exhibitions.dmns.org/

End Trans 03/31/10

Spring Cleaning - Hoodoo Style

2010-03-28T22:36:00.000-06:00

Its the night before the Full Moon and I'm prepping for an early morning rise, to spring clean the house, Hoodoo style. Every spring I wash down my house with water, infused with Hoodoo condition oils to clean out the old and bring in the new. I start on the top floor, work my way to the bottom floor, throw out the old water and scrub in new, blessings of abundance for my home and family.

I have found that when you move in the ways of the Spirit, it is very important to perform an annual cleansing of your home. Now depending on the work I do, I always perform a cleansing afterwards to clean up and release from any work I've done. However, our homes are our place of sanctuary and protection, and need to be cleansed on a routine basis. I perform smudgings regularly, and burn cleansing incenses, but the Spring Cleaning is the intense one, which includes a wash down of all doorways and windows.

In our homes, we have locks and bolts on our doors and windows, and some homes even have alarm systems, but what about protections for the stuff that you can't see, only the negative vibes that you may feel? Over the course of a year, lots of people come and go from our dwellings, bringing hopefully positive vibes with them, but there's always some funk hanging around. Not to mention energies left over from family squabbles or unwanted visitors. And if your a sensitive like me, energies will be drawn to you that you may not want to keep around!
And thus this is why I will rise before dawn, and silently wash down my home, and bless it and thank it for watching over me and my family, and our loved ones.

End Trans

03/28/10

Me and 50

2010-03-27T15:07:00.001-06:00

My 50th birthday is approaching. It will be here in approximately 2 months. I've stopped coloring my hair and every time I look at it, I freak out at the enormous amount of gray that has settled in with a vengence. I've always colored my hair. But then a few months ago I decided to grow locs, and my hair was ecstatic. I told my hair I'd stop coloring it too, and each time I said it, I felt it sigh a breath of relief.

Its hard to look at myself in the mirror with gray hair. I notice every strand, every curly-cue of gray. I particularly dislike the ones on my sideburns. And yet I'm holding strong to my promise not to color it. I notice women with gray hair, and secretly size them up as to how they move in the world. Are they gray with a youthful vibe, or are they stately and wise with their gray, or do they just look like "oh the hell with it - I'm gray, so be it!" I think I fall into each category on any given day, depending on my particular mood.

Today I looked at my gray and said, "it's a snow topped mountain!" "I have wisdom". Yeah, that's it - I keep telling myself.
Not to mention all the thoughts about mortality. For the first time my husband and I talked about what we would call ourselves, when and if our children ever have kids - which we hope is still a long way off, cause they're still too young, in our opinion.

I look at my dog and she's getting up there (as they say) too. I look to see if she's got gray eyebrows yet. Nope not yet. Yay.
Honestly I never thought I'd see myself with gray hair. I've fantasized about it. How great I would look with my brown skin and white hair. But mine isn't white. It's gray. Whole different look. And most of my friends are younger than me, and I'm also the oldest in the family. So there's nobody to look up to as a woman and say - so how are you dealing with it? Except my Mom of course. I saw a picture of her recently and her gray did look nice, however Mom is also in her 70's.

So we're crossing a new river. Gray and turning 50. I've always been blessed with a youthful countenance. Call it a Gemini blessing. So facing this new path is a bit scary. Yet I know there's something good here for me, if I can just stick it out. I'll let you know how it goes after I turn 50 in May.

And for the record, in my profile picture I'm wearing a wig. Hahaha, that's not really my hair, but how funny is that, that it's partly gray and it's one of my favorite photos!

End Trans
3/27/10

Ostara, Drums and Snow

2010-03-18T22:05:00.001-06:00

Its the Spring Equinox on Saturday. I've been looking through my magickal texts for tips on decorating my altar. Even though I change the altar for each Sabbat, so it's something I do often, I still enjoy leafing through my texts, seeing if something new catches my eye. Tonight I found myself looking through one of my favorites, Ed Fitch's "A Grimore of Shadows". I love this book. I found it in my favorite, dusty, used bookstore. The pages are yellowed and its an original copy. It screams Witch. It has wonderful pen and ink illustrations, and its pretty well thought out.

Not only is it the Spring Equinox, its also Pow-Wow weekend. I can feel the Pow-Wow coming. I can hear the jingle-jangle of the Fancy Dancers and see the Elders in their beautiful regalia. I can hardly wait to hear the Master of Ceremonies say "Everybody Dance! Its InterTribal Time". I love the Pow-Wow. It reaches down into my ancestry and connects me to the past and gives me glimpses into the future. I always purchase one special item. I let it call to me, so I know it when I see it.

Also on Saturday there's a big Ostara party, that goes all night long. There'll friends and ritual and dancing and music, and we'll all have a blast. I swear it seems the calendar just waits for this weekend. So many things going on at once! Thankfully I'll have Monday off to rest and recuperate.
Oh, and of course, we'll have SNOW! Yep, the last blast of winter and the first wet of Spring is about to descend upon us. Wouldn't be Colorado without a freaky turn in the weather. Today it was 68 degrees, tomorrow it will 30. Good thing I always have my snow boots ready.

End Trans 3/18/10

One Bad Apple

2010-03-14T23:34:00.001-06:00

I have an iphone. I love my iphone. It's guided me safely in foreign cities, kept me twittering and sending emails, recorded my voice memos, and given me some cool apps to play. Based on my iphone love, I felt I was ready to leave the world of Microsoft and purchase an iMac. I felt like a traitor when I did it and I have since come to regret my decision!

I was lured in by the slick, sleek, design of the computer. There's no tower, no cpu box to junk up your home office. And the 21" screen is amazing, and the colors, ooh they're so pretty. We bought our iMac on 1/31/10 and up until today I couldn't the @#$!!!ing thing to print! What good is a computer if you can't get it to print?!! I was unable and completely flabbergasted by the inability to set up my wireless printer! Which by the way ran perfectly on my Windows based machines.

The support from Apple is quick, and responsive but in the end, they pointed fingers to the printer manufacturer. At this point I really miss my clunky, beat-up laptop with the duct-tape covering a spot, that sat too close to a light, and just kept on working, machine.

Oh, I figured out the printer. I am not one to be denied by *&^@# machine. But it wasn't from Apple helping me, it was my own tenacity, tightly honed from working in IT that spurred me on. But now the fax won't work. UGH.

And get this, Apple support tried to SELL ME an extended warranty when I called them for support. Now that's guts. I kindly told them if I couldn't get the machine to print, it was no more than a paperweight, and I was interested in purchasing anything else. The guy said "that sounds reasonable".

So for all it's slick hi-tech image, I have grown nostalgic for my old Windows based, virus susceptible, patch laden machine. At least it prints, and it didn't take me 5 weeks to set it up!!

End Trans 03/14/10

Crafting and Conjuring

2010-03-10T08:54:00.000-07:00

I was working last night. I crafted and conjured some work for client who lives on the east coast. I love working the Hoodoo.

I sip on some whiskey, listen to Billie Holiday and get to workin'. When I am crafting and conjuring I am truly in my element.

I love being of service. My dear sister Kate, and when I say "sister" I mean she is my Circle sister. She gave me a lovely cabinet to hold my supplies and I blessed it and smudged it, and it looked so nice, filled with my oils, sachets, needles and threads, and pretty gift bags.

You see I am a Hoodoo Practitioner, a Rootworker, and a practicing Witch. I love the Moonlight, and the stars in the night sky. I sit at my table and blend oils, mix salts, light candles, and pray the highest good be served for my clients. I conjure spells of healing, prosperity, safe travel, and protection. I work honey jars and match candles to astrological signs, and I love it. It's here where I really touch my destiny, my life path, and what I came here to do.

Now don't get me wrong, I still have my day job. I'm blessed to be a successful person in the mundane world. But when I'm conjurin' and craftin', the Universe opens up to me, and I feel the touch of the Divine, and for that I am truly grateful.

End Trans 3/10/10

The Wheel Turns

2010-03-07T07:43:00.000-07:00

My son is 19 years old today. Amazing. It's hard for me to believe that 19 years have passed since he came into the world. I can still feel his shiny new presence in my heart. I can still remember that moment of holding him in my arms and singing "Happy Birthday" to him. My Fishboy.

On the day he was born, Denver was a bright and sunny place. And then every year after, his birth day, harkened incredible weather. Mostly snow or even a blizzard. However today we have very special weather, we have FOG. Fog thick as pea soup, as folks used to say. Eerie, magickal, mystical fog. A true treat for us land-locked lubbers.

One of my favorite childhood stories was about a town that magically appeared, when the fog came down. The little girl in the story would go for walks in the fog and visit the town. She became friends with all the towns people, and the when the fog lifted, the town would magically disappear. Funny what one holds onto.

So today I am grateful for the fog, and especially for my son, who is now 19 years old.

Blessed Be.

End Trans 03/07/10

Changes In Friendships

2010-02-15T13:52:00.000-07:00

My friendships mean the world to me. As a child I didn't have very many friends. We moved a lot, and it was hard for me to sustain long term relationships with kids.

As an adult I've been blessed to love and lose friendships. I say blessed because I've known the pain of a lost friendship, which means I've had friendships that when they were no longer, it broke my heart.

A week ago, my best girl from college, came and stayed the night with me. She lives in California and I hadn't seen her in 8 years. We had such a great time together. Time seemed to fly by. There's nothing better than yacking it up with your best girls. I call it Women Time. Talking about anything and everything, stop, take a breath, and talk some more. Best thing ever.

And then one of my dear friends let me know I was doing something she didn't like. "OW". Its hard for me to say, I'm glad she told me, cause it hurt when she said it, and knocked me back a pace, but I am glad she told me.
I'm glad she valued our friendship enough to say something and not let my actions sit and seethe inside her, something I find we as women are very good at doing. I'm also glad she told me because I would be so hurt to have learned a behavior that could be easily corrected, was never addressed, and she just left me in a huff. You know how we can be. One moment we're there and then your girl is gone. No explanation, nothing. Just a big ball of hurt where your friend used to be.

So, I'm humbled and having growing pains, but it's a good thing. The journey continues to unfold.

End Trans 2/15/10

Me and The Chinese Food Lady

2010-02-12T19:28:00.000-07:00

We've been getting delivery from the same Chinese food place for years. It's great Chinese food. It's just what you want - it's fast, hot, sweet, sticky and delicious. But what really makes it stand out is the relationship between me and the Chinese food lady who takes my order, over the phone. I've never met her and I've been ordering from China Dragon for 13 years. The same woman always answers the phone.

We have a code. She answers the phone in a way that you know you be better ready to order. However when I give my address, it's our "hello". I can hear the recognition and the smile in her voice. I place my order with a smiling voice, and I know she knows we're one of her loyal customers.

End Trans 2/12/10

Stink, Stank, Stunk

2010-02-06T21:50:00.000-07:00

Those are the feelings I'm left with after seeing the "Lovely Bones" at Harkins Northfield Theatres. I won't be a movie spoiler, let's just say I give it a thumbs down. I really wanted to like it, it was directed by Peter Jackson, and had some of my favorite actors in it - Susan Sarandon, Raschel Weisz. But it just never came together, for us.

But the real reason for the stink, stank, stunk, was the group of little bitches that laughed out loud, talked out loud, got and up and down from their seats, god knows how many times, and sat in the very front row of the theatre. In addition there was the woman who answered her cell phone, who sat next to me, then there was the theatre staff that tried to quietly assert their presence in the theatre, by standing obnoxiously next to the wall. Add to that the other theatre staffer who came in with a clipboard and appeared to be taking some type of stats, and oh yeah, the baby that coughed and sputtered throughout the entire film. All this for the glorious price of $9.50 per person!

As fate would have it, I walked out next to the little bitches, and one of them said "I want my money back". Well, that was it, and I told them how much I had enjoyed being in the movie with them. That conversation led to a confrontation in the hallway, and I recall the word "mama' being thrown around.

Its sad that an adult can't go to the movies anymore and not be submitted to the rude behavior of somebody else's kids. Its awful people can't leave their cell phones in their pocket or purse for the duration of a film.
I continue to go to the theatre because I like the big screen and the popcorn, and the experience of going out to the movies. But after tonight it will probably be a while before I plop down 10 bucks again for a movie.

End Trans 2/6/10

"Under the Milky Way" - Sia

2010-02-02T18:54:00.000-07:00

Blessed Imbolc.

We gathered over the weekend. It was a lovely Circle. Just the four of us and we touched our divinity and felt the breath of the Goddess.

Tonight I'm alone. Listening to "Under the Milky Way" by Sia. I lit all my candles and cast a spell, a prayer to Brigid. I felt calm and lifted.

I stepped outside and looked up to the cloudy sky and blew my kisses upward. I know She hears me and feels me.

Today was a rough day. Drama after drama unfolding in the online communities I belong to. I am thankful that tonight I had a reason to pause, reflect and remember my foundation, and that which gives me strength and peace.

On a daily basis I say a prayer that begins with "In the face of adversity, uncertainty and conflicting sensory information, I hereby pledge to remain ever mindful of the magickal, mystical, mystical, loving reality in which I live....." Although I've changed some of the words I can't take credit for the words. They come from Mike Dooley and his TUT website. "Conflicting sensory information", now thats a mouthful. Pretty much sums up everything of living in the everyday world, while flitting back and forth between the worlds of Hoodoo and the Craft. Oy vey.

I remain grateful for the simple ritual of lighting a candle and saying a prayer.

End Trans - 2/2/10

Blame it on the Craft

2010-01-24T13:57:00.000-07:00

A&E's "Paranormal State". Why do I watch such crap?

One because I'm bored, the other because I find it "entertaining". However this last show got my blood boiling. A man with a pentagram tattooed on his arm that used to practice "Witchcraft" takes credit for calling up a "shadow demon" in Circle, then everybody freaks, and have been tormented ever since. Give me a f*$!ing break! Then the shows producers and the family start to calling it a seance. Then they say, well do you think this happened because you broke the Circle? So to "heal" the family they call on Jesus Christ, everybody sits around a table and clasps hands together and now it's "magically gone" and everyone is happy.
I find the entire show blasphemous and irresponsible. Complete and utter nonsense. And who knows, maybe he did call up something dark and freaky from his own mind(!) But to blame it on Witchcraft is awful.

Let me state it for the record, right here and right now - Circle is SACRED! It's a place where Witches, Pagans, come to worship and honor the Goddess and the God. It's not a place where one calls up dark forces or entities, or WHATEVER. Circle is a sacred place where we touch our Divinity and are healed and blessed, just like Christians do when they go to Church and pray. It's no different. The same feelings of reverence and beauty and love exist, except maybe we're out in Nature -hopefully, or we're in someone's home or backyard.

I love being in Circle. It fills my heart and lifts my soul. Shame, shame on A&E's "Paranormal State". I for one will be finding a new show watch, from now on, when I'm bored.

End Trans 1/24/10

New Journal Day

2010-01-23T15:12:00.000-07:00

It's new journal day and I can feel myself getting all tingly inside. I LOVE shopping for a new journal. When I shop for a new journal I'm at the peak of my creative process. I start to think about what store will I go to, what color will the book be, how will the pages look? The thought of having a new journal to write in fills me with peace and inspiration.

I've journaled since I was a kid. An empty place to hold my thoughts and words has always been my best friend. Once on the advice of someone I trusted, I threw away all my journals. So sad, I know. This person told me that keeping all those past memories under my bed was preventing me from moving forward, so I listened to them and threw them out. I only regret throwing out one, it was my sweet little diary. The one I'd had since I was eight years old. It was orange and had a lock and a key. It was my first diary. I miss that one, still. So note to anyone who is reading this and is a journaler - don't throw out your journals! Maybe bury them or lock them away, but don't throw them out!

I moved into a new phase of journaling when I started working The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, and she taught me about Morning Pages. Morning Pages have become my sweet, sweet, quiet time for reflection, meditation and insight. At first I thought that if I wrote three pages, every day, I wouldn't have anything else to write, but it's been just the opposite. Doing that mind dump in the morning frees up my thoughts.
I look forward to writing my Morning Pages. And thus far, in a process of 11 weeks, give or take, I haven't missed a day of writing my Morning Pages. I plan to continue them even after I finish the workbook and I only have one more chapter to go.

The changes have been profound. Julia Cameron got me to see myself as an artist, a label I would have never attributed to myself, since I'm not a painter, a dancer, a crafter, etc, etc, etc. But I do have a good sense of color and magic, magick, and mystery, and ritual, and that makes me a creative person. The other day I found a magnet that reads "Artists Always Welcome". I bought it and stuck it up on my wall, in my creative space. It makes me smile every time I look at it.

And then there are the Artist Dates, where you take your inner child artist, on a date. It's all about them. We've had a blast, buying silly, goofy, things and also some things that a little girl always wanted. Its funny, as an adult, you grow up learning to put your child self away, but what I've learned through the Artist's Way, is its the child inside, who is the most important part of your adult life.

So, I'm off to find a new journal and maybe even a new pen -ooooh, won't that be special!

End Trans 1/23/10

Prayers For Haiti

2010-01-22T11:50:00.000-07:00

I belong to a great group on the web. It's called MyHoodooSpace and it's provided courtesy of Dr.Kioni.com

There are many in this group who have deep religious ties to Haiti. Of these beautiful people I have asked for a prayer. This prayer touched my heart, and with the author's permission, I gladly share it here:

"Papa Legba, Antibon, Father of a Nacion du 'Ayti
The roads are covered Papa, the paths a blocked
Only you, Papa can clear the road. Lend your hand Papa,
Lend your hand to those whose hands toil for the preservation of your land
Lend your hand to those who are desolate and are lost
Lend your hand to those who are far from their Spiritual home
Lend your hand to 'Ayiti, and to all those who are of 'Ayiti that the roads and paths may be soon cleared
That a new day may come in 'Ayiti
Let it be known that it comes from God, through your hand Papa
Hear the cry of the children of Ginen and Lend your hand
Nou tout sen yo - we are all one
Ayibobo! Ayibobo! Papa Legba Antibon, Legba vye, Ayibobo!

This is my prayer ... feel free to use it, change it or ignore it, but this is what my heart is praying over and over right now for 'Ayiti, for it's people, and for all of us that have our soul and our gwo bon anj tied to that land."
by H'oungan Liam

I am learning a lot about Haiti and it's religions. I thank H'oungan Liam for sharing this prayer from his heart, and for the power, strength, and peace I feel when I pray it. As an open-minded person, I feel I can pray this prayer and let it be. May you too feel its strength, comfort, and promise of hope.

End Trans 1/22/10

Tai Chi Me/Kung Fu You

2010-01-20T22:01:00.000-07:00

It's been a week since my last post. I've been stretched and pulled, groaning and grunting, and at one point I almost hyperventilated, from my three hour Yin/Yang stretching and conditioning class. In one week I went to Tai Chi class, then I went to my first Kung Fu class, where I learned how much fun it can be to jab someone in the throat with your elbow, and then on Saturday I went to the three hour stretching and conditioning class.

Have I lost my mind or am I so dazed by the magic of Kung Fu that I can't stop myself? I think it's a little of both. I mean let's face it, I'm 49 years old, starting martial arts. Everytime I stand next to that little 6 year old boy who out ranks me, and gives me the eye, I just want to say "what the hell are YOU looking at?!!". But hey, this is a different system and culture and the little tike out ranks me, so pride aside, he gets my respect. And guess what, I'm actually starting to get some of the form down. I don't want to get too excited about it, because I need to stay humble, but I am kinda excited that I'm learning and that my body is holding up to the postures and forms.

And here's a little secret. I'm also studying martial arts because it makes me a better Witch. As I was perusing my favorite used bookstore, Westside Books, about a year ago, I found a book called a "A Grimore of Shadows" by Ed Fitch. The pages in the book were slightly aged and it had these groovy illustrations. Ed Fitch was a close friend of the Bucklands and he wrote this book to help Witches create and run covens, and also to continue to grow in their craft. I was reading the book, I came across a chapter where Ed said that as Witches we should be proficient in the defensive arts of our time. We should know how to defend ourselves, using whatever modalities of our culture and time are available to us. That really stuck with me. Granted I've always had a fascination with martial arts, but when I read what Ed Fitch said, it stuck. Hence I now find myself in these classes.

I took a plunge tonight and signed up for a six month membership. I was going to sign up for a year, but one thing about being 49 is that I know myself now, and I can get bored with taking these classes just as fast as I got excited by them. However I'm hoping I can stick with it, because I'm having a good time and I'm learning things about me and my capabilites that I never knew.

End Trans - 1/20/10

Tai Chi Me

2010-01-13T21:12:00.000-07:00

I'm back from Tai Chi class. Remember the Charlie Brown cartoon where the teacher is talking to the students and all you can hear is "blah, blah, blah"? That's what tonight felt like. I felt like everyone was speaking a language I didn't understand - "tiger returns to the cave, fair maiden works the shuttles, plant the hammer, as if to be sealed" - WHAT?! I don't get it. Hold yourself as if your head is being held upright by a string, well if I hold my head upright I can see the f*cking postures! And then, does anyone have any questions? Uh, yeah can you print that out for me? No way, read your manual. Ok, but I still don't get it.

But then some good things did happen. I almost tied my belt correctly. I got some help with my Chi Kung postures and now I just might be able to run through all six successfully, at home. And during class I stopped trying to "get it" and just started following and the form started coming. And before I knew it the gong rang and class was over. And the people are so nice. They are all very open and accomodating. Guess when you're in a room with 30 people who can snap your neck, there's no need to be mean or intimidating. After Tai Chi was over, they convinced me to try the Kung Fu class. Just come and try it. You need to see the entire picture. Uh, ok. So now I'm going to Kung Fu tomorrow night. Pray I just get my Gi on right.

End Trans 1/13/10

Japan 2010!

2010-01-13T15:51:00.002-07:00

I'll be 50 years old in May. As a good friend said today "what???!". I know it's hard for me to believe it too, and with that said I've decided to let the gray that so vigorously wants to stay in my hair, stay. But that's a whole 'nother story.

I've been obsessed with Japan and all things Japanese since I was a child. I attribute a lot of this to going to elementary school in LA, with a lot of Japanese children. Not to mention the huge influence of Japanese and Chinese culture in California itself. I have great memories of eating in Japanese restaurants with tatami mats, and rooms secluded by bamboo screens. And I love Japanese and Chinese food. I am definitely a ramen addict and could eat Thai food, Japanese food and Chinese food all day, every day. I'm beginning to drool now, just thinking about the cuisine.

SO, what about this trip to Japan? In my life that is the magickal mystery tour of Najah, I have always felt that it was part of my destiny to visit Japan. Something larger than just a visit calls me there. My eyes ache to see a Geisha as she slips down an alley, going about her business for the evening. My heart longs to see Mt. Fuji. And I can hardly wait to take a ride on the bullet train.
I long to see a temple shrouded in mist, and walk the steps to sacred sites. My body aches for the release of a Japanese hot spring. And the doll, there's a Japanese porcelain doll just waiting for me in lacquered black box. I just know it.

It took me a while to decide on the best time to visit, as my heart had been set on visiting during Cherry Blossom festival time. But then I happened upon photos of Japan in autumn, and my breath was taken away. The beauty of the Japanese Maples and the still beauty of the temples in autumn, is beyond description. So, I've decided to visit Japan in the fall.

As I began to approach 50, several months ago, I said to myself, how am I ever going to get to Japan, if I don't take myself there? Can I really do it? This is one of the soul things I'm meant to do, but will I really do it? So, a few years back I got my passport. And then about a year ago I started saving. There were lots of stops and starts, but I did it. Today I made my deposit to my Japan savings account, so now I can buy my tickets!! Whoo-hooo!

I've been blessed to make a blog pal, who is living in Kyoto, attending the University of Japan. I found her blog as I was googling for pictures of Japan. Below is a link to one of her photos, that sums up all my feelings and what I hope to see when I'm there. I hope to post soon that I've purchased my tickets!

Enjoy - http://www.flickr.com/photos/hollywood_north/2253989346

End Trans 1/13/10

Teeth Pain - Again

2010-01-07T18:09:00.000-07:00

My love/hate relationship with the dentist continues topping out with whopping pain in the left side of my face. A serious cold came on, adding to the throbbing, blinding, headache pain I have, whether I turn my head, left or right, or move it up and down.
Is it the dentist's fault? Do I blame them. Nah. I'm grown-up enough to know I needed to go to the dentist, but I'm sad I'm suffering from pain that wasn't there before I went. I appreciate they saw me right away and prescribed me antibiotics - although I'm hoping it doesn't give me that girl side affect, the women know what I'm talking about, and pain meds. Have you ever noticed how teeth pain gets your attention?
So, I'm home bound, snuggled in and medicated, and hopeful by tomorrow it will truly be a brand new day.

End Trans 1/07/10

Teeth Pain

2010-01-05T01:27:00.000-07:00

It's 1 o'clock in the morning and I'm up. My teeth hurt. Right after the movies today I went to the dentist. And believe me, me going to the dentist is a big deal. This is my second trip to the dentist in six years. There's nothing magickal or mystical about having a 4 inch needle stuck in your gums. And teeth pain is different. The regular old tylenol or advil doesn't begin to touch it. I'm thankful I've held onto vicodin that was prescribed for me for another condition. I mean doesn't everybody hold onto their pain meds, hoarding them like precious commodities because you never know when you'll need them? I do, and it's for times like these that I am grateful that I do.

This pain is from having my teeth cleaned. Can you believe that? My gums are so sensitive and I have such a high level of dental PTSD that the only way they could clean my teeth, was to numb my half my mouth, and clean half my teeth at a time. Again, women here play a powerful role. My husband, bless his wonderful heart, is a regular dentist goer. The only way he was able to convince me to go, was by telling me the new dentist is a woman. And sure enough, that was the ticket to get me to go back. See I was traumatized by a man dentist. Several years ago I went in for a routine wisdom teeth removal, only to painfully learn the dentist was in way in over his head. I kept coming up out of the anesthesia, seeing the dentist sweating, trying to ratchet my teeth out of my head. His ineptitude resulted in my receiving a horrid sinus infection, which resulted in me having out patient surgery to remove the infection! No wonder I have dental PTSD. But sure enough Dr. Manske and her wonderful staff, again, all women, let me cry and tell them why it had been so long since I'd been to the dentist. And to keep me coming back, and help me with the pain - six years without a cleaning is a long time, they numb the entire half of my mouth, so they can chip away at the build up. Makes my skin crawl just writing about it.

Now thankfully I was raised with good oral hygiene. My Mom instilled in me good dental practices. I can't sleep unless I brush my teeth before I go bed. That practice has saved me, because according to my exam I don't need much work, no root canals - thank god! - just some filling upkeep on a couple of crowns. So does this mean I'm going to follow through with my dental plan? Yeah, I'll keep going even though it gives me the heebie jeebies and sets me off kilter for hours afterward. Why, well for one I'm beginning to trust in Dr. Manske and her great team. Two, I don't want to lose my teeth. Mom was telling me a while awhile ago about how important it is to have your teeth as one gets older. Definitely want to keep my teeth, so I'll keep going.

Thanks for listening. The pain is subsiding and I can go back to bed to now.

End Trans 1/5/10

I'm Stoked! AVATAR in digital 3D Rocks!

2010-01-04T17:57:00.001-07:00

Ok, I'm a techie, and I'm a sucker for anything visual that smacks of the dreamtime and visions. Add to that powerful women and I'm hooked. James Cameron has hit the nail on the head with AVATAR. There's something here for everyone, action, adventure, sci-fi, tech, great plot, all the things that make a movie great and memorable. Further more Cameron breaks out da box and says "yeah we can do this and more". I appreciate his courage to say what he has said...notice I'm being very careful not to be a plot spoiler, cause I hate that sh*t.

And oh yeah, I have a new girl crush...Michelle Rodriquez. I've been a fan of her work since "Girlfight" which I thank my kids for turning me on to watching. Way to go sister. Carry on!

End Trans 1/4/10

Woman's Space

2010-01-02T10:16:00.001-07:00

"We all come from the Goddess and to Her we shall return like a drop of rain, flowing to the ocean" ZBudapest.

We gathered for Circle last night. Six of us, coming together in worship. We came to worship the Goddess and have Woman's Space.

How important is it for us to gather together as women? One of the things that led me to a Goddess-centered life was the ability to worship Divinity through the power of Women. We need to see ourselves in a positive light, in a strong light and to know we exist in Divinity, separate from the role of care-giver and nurturer. As we worship the Goddess we come to know Her power, Her strength, Her voice, and we know She hears and speaks to us.

"The Full Moon is calling, the fever is high, and the wicked wind whispers and moans..." , my favorite line from the Eagles "One of The Nights". I love seeing the Moon rise, feeling my own fever and emotions rise, and knowing I have a place to be, with those who feel the same as me, in Circle. Thirteen times a year I am able to honor my feelings, my love of the Moon, the Goddess and the Universe, and be healed and raised to the ectasy of the Divine.

Outsiders don't get it. They think "How can you experience divinity outside of a church"? My divinity lies within me, nurtured by the Moon, the turn of the Wheel, and the changing of the seasons. It wakes up and smiles through the scent of incense and the light of candles burning. It speaks to me through song and the written word, and as a Pagan and practicing Witch it is always there for me. It may be different from the norm, but it's my way, and I am blessed to have found it.

Blessed Be

Sore, Humbled and Weepy

2009-12-31T09:22:00.000-07:00

My muscles ache, and I'm feeling the burn. My abs are tender and my calve muscles are screaming. I've completed my first month of studying Tai Chi as a Martial Art and this is my body's response.

I'm a beginner's beginner. A humbled and uncomfortable place for a Westerner. Each week I go and stand in the back of the room in my stark white Gi, bow, and began the practice.

It stinks in there. Smells like feet and layers of body sweat. The instructor says "take a deep breath" and my mind says "are you kidding?!" But breathe and bend and stretch I do, because I know there's a powerful system at work here, and I desire to achieve the benefits of this ancient Chinese Art.

As I was proud of my first month of classes at the Shao-Lin Center, I was told give it 10 years. Ten years! My Western mind reels and balks at the thought. Another tidbit of wisdom gets passed to me "you know nobody here has mastered this form". Whoa you mean I'm studying something I'll never master and even those with the title of "Master" are still learning? What have I gotten myself into?

I've gotten myself into Open Mind. I feel elated I am studying an art, a practice that gets better as I age. I'll be 50 in May, and I feel encouraged that one of the highest ranking members in our school is over 65, and he's still excited. I feel I can do it and I am encouraged by those achieving their belts in King Fu. And when they tell me Kung Fu means "time and effort" it helps me to hang in there.

So even though today I am sore, humbled, and weepy, I know this grasshopper is on the right path.

Full Moon in Cancer

2009-12-30T11:38:00.000-07:00

I can feel the energy of the Full Moon pulling me, almost demanding that I break into tears. And why? I'm doubly sensitive, a Gemini with her Moon in Cancer. Add to that the irrational raving of Mercury in Retrograde, and it's hard not to feel as if the whole world is conspiring against you.

These times call for the Serenity Prayer and the phrase "this too shall pass" in heaping doses.

End Trans - 12/30/09